Well, I am shortlisted for the job in Takasaki. Not the worst thing in the world. This means that if the people before me do not accept the offer it just goes down the line until someone accepts.

My assumption will be that someone will accept. That is quite alright as I had a second interview with Genius Educational Academy last night that went well. But Tommy got an offer to a place that is way North of Shizuoka. The job that he got offered seems like a really great opportunity.

So we are back again on what we would do. It is tearing at my heart everyday to not know what is going on. I hate the idea of not going but I am terrified that I will not be any good at teaching or that I will go broke or a countless number of things. It would be my first real step on my own (in a sense) and of course it has to be more than just getting my own place. Instead, the crazy mo'fo' that I am, is going to go halfway around the world. Where I know absolutely no one. Just Tommy. And there is no guarantee we will be near each other unless one follows the other. But then what if the other can't get a job? Looks like a trip to Korea would be in store?

Today Tommy is at a conference so I am hanging out at the hotel. He doesn't know I had nightmares about Japan last night. That I just felt so isolated being immersed in an entirely different language.

Maybe it was because I snapped a tinsy bit and said something really mean to Tommy last night. Something along the lines of "Well why did you have to come back?" I still feel terrible. He never wanted to come back, he got dragged back and then ditched. Now he is finally getting the chance to go back and here I am - an emotional rollercoaster of a girlfriend. Trying so hard to be okay and find a job and not worry. Trying to support without freaking out too much.

Somedays are just better than others I suppose...